rockstar: black and white!

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x. The days have been bright & sunny, eating safeway sushi at Kody's dining table, while the wind blew in through the screen door, and feeding his dog rice & seaweed. I've been exercising, taking walks, taking photographs of flowers & strange places, my smile, my cheeky chipmunk smile, his green lake water eyes.

x. At the supermarket we bought a cap gun, for wild west day ;










x. kody took the safety cap off it. it was ugly and orange.
Yes he has quite a smashing sombrero & yes a sombrero has nothing really to do with wild west day, i suppose. But that's besides the point.

I had way too much fun pointing the gun around shouting "bang bang!"

x. I am reading children's books & white oleander again for the millionth time, and writing letters.
Want one?

x. life is fucking beautiful.
musicians: Fiona Apple, extraordinary

spring to them &&& summer to me.

your kisses are pearls.


we inhale sugar in the garage, and share kisses;
your mom brings me california rolls for supper
& I wrap my arms around her, squealing.
I am a strange girlthing, listening to
Mushroomheaad, the smell of chili
climbing up the stairs, filling the room,


Make me fly fly fly, grow wings.

I am making a cloud doll, I am learning
how to sew.
  • Current Music
    mushroomhead
elegance: pride & prejudice

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What time are we upon, and where do I belong? - Witch baby, Francesca Lia Block



Witch baby. Bruja baby, you have it all right. What time are we upon? Everyday it feels different. Walking near an old 50's style gas station, teacups on people's lawns, markets with retro signs, chivalry, holding hands.

A 50's diva, a bubble gum popping 80's girl, a princess with hair to her waist, a ninety's girl with rollerskates and fairy wings, a woman-child, a girlthing, a rhythm star girl. Words on her wrists, stars on her lips.
rockstar: black and white!

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Today has been a mix of nerves and goodness.

x.I have an interview for a coffee shop on monday. Nerves nerves nerves. I don't even know if I want coffee work again, but, it's money, and I can do it. And it's just an interview. One step at a time.

x.I got a daily deviation on deviantart for my writing. I squeeled. I really did. As mixed as I feel about deviantart sometimes, that really made my day.

x. My good friend Odessa (odessa11 @ deviantart) has moved to Portland, and I hope I can have tea parties with her, and photo shoots.

x. Hope. Hope is good.
seasons: wintertime

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big fat snowflakes covered my world, and i lay in bed at 6 in the morning half asleep, watching it silently drift past my window. It's melting now, and the trickles of water is soothing.

I took a bath with pearls & the virgin suicides.
I smell like vanilla.
lost: lullaby / vs

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Of Hunger, and Strange Demons


It is supposed to be friday
but it feels more like a tuesday, your
mother is smoking a cigarette, her
nicotine stained fingers shaking
just slightly, and me tap dancing,
waiting for the gay parade. There are
protestors wearing loose pants and smoking
cigars, their mouths stained with jaded-
hate and misunderstanding. You are

staring at your bony fingers, you haven't
eaten in 3 days, I offer you
noodles from a bowl, you'd rather
eat dust, you say. Your mouth is
an aching red. My heart is a dove
trapped in a cage. This is supposed
to be a gala, it feels more like
death-day. Later we will

sit around the campfire, and
I will stroke your shoulders that
feel like skulls and swallow tears.

I don't intend to save you,
You don't intend to live to be
seventeen.
other worldly: drowning

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I feel guilty in my silence.


But I have no words, lately. I have nightmares
and am collecting fortunes from fortune cookies.

I feel distant and strange.
I started reading The Virgin Suicides again, in the bath.
The pages are damp, and scribbled on and highlighted.

That book is very much loved.